Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
Apparently "he pulled out..mostly" is not a valid reason for thinking there's no way i can be pregnant to the nurses at the student health center.
When did it seem like a good idea to do pull ups off the balcony? After beer 5 or shot 7?
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
If anything I look like a soccor mom going out for her annual ladies night. Trying hard, but not quite in her twenty's anymore.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Randomize