yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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