i'm returning your mother's day gift to finance my alcoholism over the next week.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
