a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I can't put those talents on a resume
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Randomize
