it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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