I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
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