just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
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