Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
Randomize
