$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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