I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
I lull them into a false sense of security with my gayness. Then when they're vulnerable, I strike, like a snake. A big non-gay snake, with huge balls.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize