Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Randomize
