How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Buhtt sex?
you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Are you saying being a wizard and going to hogwarts wouldn't be life changing, believe in magic you fucking muggle
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
Randomize