I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
