Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I just found out my first birthday was a keg party. Suddenly everything makes sense
WAIT U DIDN'T FEED THE SQUIRREL?
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
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