I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
