I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
