It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
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