wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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