so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
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