i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
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