You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
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