Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize