Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
I don't think brook has ever known best
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Hey do you have a way to post bail? If not we can hook you up. If a police officer is reading this please ask him and respond in a timely fashion. I am concerned for my imprisoned friend
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
The only thing I want for my birthday is a divorce from you.
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