I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
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Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I told you, I'm taking a sledgehammer to your walls. Fuck your walls.
I'm Batman.
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she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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