So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize
