Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
You should probably just propose to him the old fashioned way: sleep with him and get pregnant.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
