idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
This guy just asked me to stab his arm with my keys to make sure he wasn't dying.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Holy shit dude........stairs
Randomize
