"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize