Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
