They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
