Kiss
Puke
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
they ran out of ice so they are using frozen shrimp in their drinks
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
He sent me a blank text message. That's a booty call waiting to happen
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize
