just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I have a cheeseburger in my purse and im going to fill her prescription for narcotics. Who thought i was responsible enough to sign her discharge papers?
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
