i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize
