I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
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