it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Randomize
