Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
hotel security told us you walked into the hotel with blood all over your dress, weren't wearing any underwear and were escorted back by three men who were believed to be "homosexuals".
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Wasn't his fault he kicked a hole in the wall, they should have never tried to give him a bath after tequila.
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Randomize
