God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
Randomize
