Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
aparently i pased my english final. I don't even remember taking it.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize