we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
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