HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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