Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.
Stop texting me, I'm right here.
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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