i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Randomize