just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
Randomize
