She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
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