On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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