Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
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