So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Let's paint friendship bongs
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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