Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Randomize
