summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize
