then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
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